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Sunday, October 12, 2008

The Revolution Involves Laundry Chores

I’m elbow deep in mail and bill sorting early on a Sunday, and Katherine charges into the room.

“Mommy, I need you to do something for me and it’s VERY SERIOUS.”


“I need you to put all of Patrick’s clothing away and then tell me and I’ll tell him that it’s all put away.”

“Uh, why would I do this, and why are you asking me to do it?”

Katherine:  “Because I’m supposed to do it.”

Wait a minute.  “Why are you supposed to put Patrick’s clothing away?”

“Because he’s my new boss, Mommy!”

Pause. Okay.  “How did this happen?”

Katherine sighs, and explains thusly:  “Cuz Patrick is going to pay me and I’m his servant so I have to put his clothing away, but I don’t know how to and anyway I don’t want to so I want you to and then he’ll give me money, so okay?”

Oh for crying out loud.  “Let’s go downstairs.  I need to talk to Patrick.  And by the way, it’s not happening.  Patrick, you are not her boss, you cannot pay her to do your chores.”

Patrick, deep in his game of Super Smash Bros, shrugs and says “o-KAY Mom.”

20 minutes later –

“Mommy, I need some money.”

Sigh.  “Why?”

“Because I need to pay Patrick to BE MY SLAVE!”

“Katherine, that is also not going to happen.”

A dirty look is shot my way, and I hear Katherine stomping back down the stairs.  Faint sounds of whiny arguing is heard.

“He’s going to be my slave anyway Mom.  He has to!  He is not the boss anymore!”

“Really? Has there been a coup?”

“A what?”

“Patrick isn’t boss anymore because you made yourself boss?”

“Yep.  A coup!  A coup!”

“Yeah.  Well.  No, I won’t back that one either.”

Too late, she’s already triumphantly descending the stairs, hollering, “It’s a coup, Patrick!  I’m taking over. YOU ARE MY SLAVE.”

I give up.  “Make it a bloodless coup at least,” I yell down the stairs.

“What’s that?”

“No fighting or hitting!”

“A bloodless coup!  A bloodless coup!  You have to put away my laundry and I won’t hit you!”

I guess the paperwork will have to wait.

11:07 am edt 

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